Whirlwind tour for the holiday

As i scatter about the house to pack everything needed for our three day getaway, the same question echos from my husband's lips that i know so well, how many days are we going?  Are we moving out?  Answered with, no dear husband, just pack the car and fit it all in.  We'll use every bit. 
And we do.  

Finally hitting the road an hour and a half after we planned.  Liam and Charlie tucked into the backseat with pillows, food, suitcases, bags and baby supplies surrounding them.  Liam happily coo's as Charlie sits against the door with his tongue flapping out the window.  Headed out of dodge, up to Vermont to Mimi & P's to spend the holiday.

Off the interstate, first stop is the Richmond Market.  What a delightful little store.  So much Vermont goodness nestled into tiny isles.  With Liam on my hip, we follow my mom around the store, her store.  She spins in circles as i grab a roll for Liam to gnaw on while we're rapidly approaching his dinner time.  I gaze at the local products offered, the fresh bread, the VT chocolate milk, while warm drool laced with soggy bread travels down my arm.  A smiley baby looks up at me and tucks his face into my shoulder for a hug.  My shirt is covered with bread drool.
Motherhood is better than i ever thought it would be.

We arrived close to sunset to my parents ranch nestled among tall pines and the dozen small houses that fill their neighborhood.  A night to settle in before my brother and his family arrive in the morning.  Dinner is served up at 8pm, which feels like 6.  Liam shows off all of his new tricks as we pile food onto our plates.  

Awakened by the bright morning sun, a still sleeping babe and my hubby by my side.  Early morning conversation while the breast pump provides a familiar soundtrack.  Back into bed to read and relax while Liam still snoozes.  Feeling fabulous.

Up with coffee waiting by Liam's chair, prepared just as i like, by my hubby.  After breakfast we load up and head to Lincoln for Liam's very first story time at Mimi's library.

My heart, her heart were so full.

Favorite songs are sung.  Rhymes and books are read.  A snack is shared.

And on we travel,

We fly, down Route 7, destination; Pittsford. Along the way, farms expand and fade on the horizon.  Agriculture is big, very big where i am from.  I love going back and seeing all of the thriving farms.  The fields of corn, some doing better than others with all of this rain.

We swing in for lunch at grams.  Grilled hot dogs with buttered buns, of course.  Liam enjoys time belly'd up the bar and playing on the floor in the porch.  Memories are shared and preserved.  Time is moving away from us, as she begins to pack her precious house up.  The house they built when mom was just a girl.  The land that saw three kids move away, countless grandchildren tromp through and many quiet mornings, writing in her journal, listening to the silence of the day.  She is moving on, and i'll leave it at that, as that is her story to tell.

Our day ended back at Mimi and P's to greet Liam's six cousins, share some pizza and finally, head to Bristol for the fireworks.

Part two coming.

An essay on time

Under a thousand stars and one waning moon, we walked the day away.  

His eyes followed the sliver of moon as we moved.  He was uncomfortable and tired.  Too tired for a bottle, too tired to put himself to sleep.  Into the ergo he went and we slipped out the back door.  A visit to the brook, to say goodnight.  A blanket wrapped tightly around his bare legs.  A walk through the blueberry bushes and peach trees.  The sound of summer surrounding us.  Crickets, peepers, filling the cool night air.  After just one loop around the property, he looked up at the moon, taking it in again and then right at me.  A full, beautiful smile filing his face as he remembered he was tucked tightly against his mama.  His heart.  

Soon after, his body relaxed and his nightly slumber began.

Between my fingertips, time is slipping through, no matter how tight i hold the grip.  May and June.  The months of flowers blooming, garden planting, warmth becoming the daily normal and strawberries beginning to turn a delicious red.  I keep notes, snapshots of our days, our normal, in my mind.  I think that i will hold onto how i felt, in that moment, forever.  But i can't.  I can hardly remember what the weight of his head felt like as we learned how to breastfeed together.  How his little body slumped and flopped in the baby bathtub.  How his legs curled up, tucked under his body, resting against my beating heart, always.  We hear it daily from many parents with young children.  "Time, slow down."  

But the truth is, the month of June was hard.  Liam had three double ear infections, resulting in many trips to the doctors, many sleepless nights, missed work and far too many antibiotics for his little body to handle.  Husband, of course, had to work the night shift far from home for two weeks.  I cried and laughed and pushed through.  I held my baby and sang him to sleep while tears rolled down my tired cheeks.  I called husband at 2:30am and regained some strength from him settling Liam (and me) by just his voice.  I called in some reinforcements when i had to be on a bid call and Liam was just so sick and wanted to be held.  So, for the past month, i have been hoping for tomorrow.  Wishing for a better day.  Praying for a healthy baby.  

Time, move forward.

Liam has been getting more and more excited about food.  He has always been a good eater, but over the past few weeks he has wanted whatever we are eating.  It's fun to give him bits and pieces of our food, watching his face figure out the flavors, the textures.  On sunday i made a batch of blueberry pancakes.  With a touch of syrup on his flapjack, boy housed them.  

Bath's have turned into splash, play time.  His once current play space on the floor has expanded as he moves in circles, finding what he wants.  Block towers are built and immediately knocked down with a squeal and smile.  It's the best.

Time, stay right here, right now.

From delicately touching, learning the give and take of a grass blanket, to suddenly ripping and grabbing clovers and just as fast, handfuls of green filling his mouth, tasting.  Always tasting.  I've become good at the finger-hook-in mouth to dig out the unwanted bits.

Watching him grow and learn, well it's better than i ever expected.

Benefits of husband working in Maine, fresh lobster for dinner.  

He fits perfectly on my hip.  It's his favorite place to be.  The extra weight i still carry around helps support his leg as he holds onto my shirt.  As i continue to try to lose the rest of my pregnancy weight, i look at how amazing my body is.  Thyroid-less body, you grew this amazing boy.  You kept him nourished and thriving.  You gave us this gift of becoming parents.  The weight will come off.  I'm not worried about it, especially as i'm still pumping for all of his milk needs.  My body is still working for him, for his health.  My body feels healthy and strong.  If i never get back to my pre-pregnancy weight, i will still feel good.  I still feel beautiful.  I'm a happy wife and mother.  I've got some happy guys that love me like no other.  

So yes.  I say yes to ice cream dates weekly.  I say yes to bacon on Sundays.  I say yes to evening walks and home workouts.  I say yes to balance and salads and fresh strawberry pies.  

I say yes to life.

His tongue is typically out.  He just learned this cute little pout, that he thinks is hilarious.  He screams when we buckle him in the high chair.  Just one quick howl and then he's content to wait for his meal.  Bottle feeding to sleep is coming to a close, as he puts himself to sleep in his crib more nights than not.  Some nights he wakes regularly.  Some nights it's nine hours straight, if he's feeling well.

Charlie has become the funniest dog in the world.  When he walks by Liam, he will do a full body shake and Liam starts rolling with laughter.  If he can get close enough, he'll pull all of the hair off Charlie's body.  They are close now, i love it.

Summer meals have begun to retreat to the porch.  The traffic driving by is watched with deliberate eyes.  Twinkling eyes.  His hands, face, hair and typically entire body are covered in bits of his meal.  He laughs and smiles as we sing his favorite songs.

Everyday, i wake up eager to cuddle him, rock him as the morning sun falls softly into his room.  While this season of life is hard at times, it's also the most rewarding.  Coffee helps in the mornings.  A good book helps in the evenings.  Binge Netflix watching happens on the hardest nights.  Easy conversation and shared love for our learning boy strengthens our marriage.

I'm content, happy, with today.

Tomorrow is welcome to come.  Bringing more blessings than sorrows.  More joy than tears.  

And, hopefully, probably the most happiness and peace in our hearts.

Time, i'll see you in the morning.  And i can't wait.

First Strawberries

During my pregnancy, i lived off strawberries for a good full month of the summer.  As soon as our patch exploded red juiciness, i picked and devoured.  Jason and i would joke that our little one would be bound to love strawberries. 

Liam and i were walking by the patch today and noticed some red peeking out, it's time.  The first juicy berry went straight into Liam's drooly mouth.  The boy was hooked.  He gobbled it down, juice running down his chin, onto his shirt, down my arm.  

I love this motherhood gig.  It's the best.